Are you under the age of a thousand? Well it’s possible this post isn’t directed at you so much as it is for you to laugh and nod your head along to in agreement.
But if you are one of these cranky-pants (usually) old people who just can’t stand to see the games you love and respect tarnished by these punk-ass whippersnappers who are soiling the good name of sports with their godawful … (checks notes) … expressions of joy
…well then, this one goes out to you…
The issue most recently came to light after a televised rant by Canadian hockey icon and owner of the loudest suit collection in the world, Don Cherry…
You see, Mr. Cherry has a bone to pick with the Carolina Hurricanes. The Canes have been following games they’ve won at home this season with choreographed celebrations. This has been enthusiastically embraced by their fan base and may actually be partly responsible for an uptick in attendance in Raleigh. Hell, there are people who had never even heard of the Carolina Hurricanes before who think this is fun and engaging and awesome.
But if you ask Cherry, the Hurricanes are not fun. They are not engaging. They are actually, and I quote, “a bunch of jerks”…
Now, nevermind the fact that the guy wearing THAT suit is accusing anyone else of making a spectacle of themselves. My point is not to say that Cherry isn’t entitled to his opinion. My point is to say that his opinion is bad and wrong and stupid. And despite what he thinks, it’s actually bad for the next generation of hockey players and fans.
To illustrate that point, I need to show you one more video. Click the link in this tweet. Trust me, you wont be disappointed…
— Kelly Norton (@kanorton84) February 16, 2019
That, my friends, is a fan being made for life. Isn’t that sweet and wholesome and just delightful? Don Cherry would probably tell this kid to go get a job. Fuck that.
Sports are supposed to be fun. Sports are supposed to be entertaining. And when the Hurricanes celebrate or Cam Newton dances or Yasiel Puig pimps a home run, that shit is both.
If you ask me, the most puke-inducing phrase in sports is
“THE INTEGRITY OF THE GAME”
Let’s be honest, professional sports leagues are running lower and lower on “integrity” seemingly every year. So take it from me, kids. Enjoy the game. Have fun. Feel free to celebrate when you do something good. And most importantly…stay far away from Don Cherry’s tailor.